The Worst Nursery Rhyme EVER!

My Grandfather’s Clock

My grandfather’s clock was too large for the shelf
Who needs a clock that big?
So it stood ninety years on the floor
It was taller by half than the old man himself
Isn’t referring to him as “the old man” a little insensitive?
Though it weighed not a pennyweight more
What is a pennyweight? Was the old man a fatty?

It was bought on the morn of the day that he was born
And was always his treasure and pride
Oh, the old man must have loved his clock like James loves his lovey.
But it stopped, short never to go again
When the old man died
Wait, what? What kind of nursery rhyme is this???

Ninety years without slumbering
His life seconds numbering
It stopped, short never to go again
When the old man died
This is a TERRIBLE song!

My grandfather said that of those he could hire
Not a servant so faithful he found
I just don’t even know what to say about this nonsense.
For it wasted no time and had but one desire
At the close of each week to be wound
Wound? Didn’t it have a plug?

And it kept in its place, not a frown upon its face
And its hands never hung by its side
I am so confused.
But it stopped short, never to go again
When the old man died
This is quite possibly the worse rhyme I have heard.

Click here to hear this twisted song!

2 thoughts on “The Worst Nursery Rhyme EVER!

  1. Holy moly Gussie, this is a scary nursery rhyme.I’ve never heard it before. I think you and James need to hide under some blankies when this comes on 😂

  2. Oh my–I had never heard this song before and hope never to hear it again!!! You are right it may be the worse song ever– you and James and Mommy all need some ice cream and blueberries to recover from trying to make sense of it!

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